Her response was, "I think you can, too! But what if you don't? Are you going to be ok with that?"
Six times this month, I chose to be ok. I really wanted to go straight through the thirty one days of writing. But if we're being honest, there was one day where I just had zero words. There was a couple other days where I was just too busy; other commitments won out. I'm sure on more than one day, I just chose to go to bed instead of writing. Whatever the reason, some days were just really hard and something had to give.
Isn't this so much like the journey of motherhood. We want to go all the way, be the best, give 100%. But we're going to miss the mark in our less-than-perfect words, in our distractions, in our tiredness. In all our weaknesses, we're not going to show up at our best every single day. Those days are hard and we need practical ways to make the load lighter, hence the title of my series being Making Motherhood Easier. However, I do not want easy to be my end goal. Am I right when I say there is something good in the hard?
"We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love."
My end goal is Jesus. And because that is completely true, the hard stuff has to be there. This is what brings me closer to Jesus and for that I'm so grateful. When I'm unable to make it 100%, it's Jesus that gets me rest of the way. Thinking back to newlywed Shelia makes me chuckle. I had no clue what life was about. Ok, I still don't. But five and a half years of marriage and two kids later, I understand a tiny bit more. I've grown up a smidge. My relationship with Christ is deeper. I'm different in a really good way. And guess what? It's because of finding Jesus in all the challenges and missed marks. I would never dream of giving any of it back because I see too much goodness in all that Christ did.
"So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up."
Galatians 6:9, my motto of motherhood
If I could rename this series, I would call it Making Motherhood More About Jesus. Even today, as much as my flesh cries You're crazy!, my heart is at rest. I know how the story goes. Tomorrow might be different. I'll lose sight of the goal and then there will be Jesus. The reality of this journey is that it is hard and it is good. Some day I will reflect on these little years and remember how the Lord filled in my gaps and met with me in all the moments that I thought This is hard. This is too much. I think those will turn into the easy moments, the relief moments, the blessings of not giving up.
|This is the last post of my 31 Days series.|
Click through to check out other posts that I wrote for October 2013.
Thank you for reading along!